well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize