dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize