you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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