So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Watching her eat just hurts me
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
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