Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
splinters make it hard to masturbate
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
Randomize