haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
Randomize