I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
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I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
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Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
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