Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦🏼♀️
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
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