I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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