so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
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