Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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