I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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