Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
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