Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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