This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
My feet surprised me
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