this just has baby written all over it
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
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K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
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it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
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