I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
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