do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Randomize