My friends, they love my intelligence
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize