I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
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