WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
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