Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
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