I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
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