I just saw a hot homeless man
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize