we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
We have started to decorate penises.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
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