Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
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There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
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I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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