ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
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He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
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did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
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