I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
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Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
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I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
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