Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize