i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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