I'd wear matching sweaters with you
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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