i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
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