i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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