I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
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