The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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