the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
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