I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
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