3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
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Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
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He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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