there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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