why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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