No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
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I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
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She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
I deserve this hangover.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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