Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
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