Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize