Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize