all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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