I feel like abortions should bother me more
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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