he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
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I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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