May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Randomize