I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
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