Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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